Breath in - Breath out

Those of you that know me well, know my personality...I am a worrier, a planner, a bit of a control freak :o) and all of those things are seriously being ampliphied already and I'm only 4 weeks pregnant!! First let me start with the awesome news...you all saw my post on Friday that we are officially pregnant! We tried to document the occassion with a picture of the pregnancy test, but as you'll see below, those are really hard to capture on camera :o)



Despite the bad picture we really are pregnant!! Our blood tests came back with HCG levels of 7 and 61. The goal is for your numbers to double every 48 hours or so...ours was pretty much 9X's higher after 2 days...so that is an awesome step in the right direction! I'm trying really hard to not get caught up in the numbers though as they vary so much by person...the ultrasound on the 6th will really be what will tell us how our babies are doing...and if there is baby or babies hanging out in there :o) Jacob and I have had a lot of fun talking about our little miracles and how excited we are to meet them next spring! We even broke out the name book we had bought back in February and began playing the name game. As I mentioned in a previous post we have a boy and a girl name picked out already, but decided we might need to be prepared just in case we're doubly blessed! I'm still leaning towards thinking there is just one, but Jacob is just sure it's twins! At this point, all I want is for any babies that are in there that they hang on tight and grow, grow, grow!!

Now on to the worrying...:o) I have warned Jacob from the get go, that if we got the wonderful news on the 25th that we were pregnant it was going to be a LONG anxious week or so as we await our first ultrasound. And the fun has already begun...haha!! I've been told that as soon as you become pregnant you are aleady a Mom because that is when all the worrying begins...and it will never really end. And as someone who has been suffering with infertility for almost 3 years I think the fear and worry about what could happen is just all the more apparant...especially after suffering a loss 8 short months ago. So as on top of the world as I feel, there is always that nagging voice in the back of my head saying "slow down...don't get too excited, yet!" Of course it didn't help that I had a little bleeding and cramping going on yesterday. I pretty much freaked out!! From what I've read this is totally normal and nothing to worry about, but as my rational side tried to calm my emotional side down the truth is my heart was sinking as I dreaded the worst. I'm feeling much better today, so hopefully it was nothing, but please continue to keep Jacob and I and our little miracles in your prayers! This first trimester is a scary one, but hopefully we'll make it through with out any problems!

Countdown to 1st Ultrasound: 9 days!