“God…are you trying to tell me something?”

Just to give everyone an update…I STILL have not talked to Dr. Ahlering…almost a week after our scheduled call and nothing! He sent me an e-mail the morning after we were supposed to talk (Wednesday) that just said “we’ll talk today.” Phew, a big sigh of relief I thought…only to wait all day…taking my phone everywhere with me…checking it constantly like a teenage girl waiting for a boy to call…until finally about 6 PM…I knew I wasn’t going to talk to him today either. Trying to remain calm, I sent him an e-mail Thursday morning asking if he thinks he’ll have a chance to squeeze in a call with me today…and if not could he please at the very least tell me if there are any major findings in our tests and if we qualify for the low stim protocol. But all I got was more silence…nothing…not an e-mail or a call…or anything. At this point, I really have started to give up hope. I talked to someone at the front desk of his office on Friday that filled me in on the fact that he was on vacation. I didn’t ask when he left for vacation or when he was coming back…I mean I was trying to act aloof…like it’s no big deal…even though I’m shouting obscenities on the inside *grin*. She kindly offered to e-mail him and find out when he was planning to call me…and she would call me back when he responded, but once again I have yet to hear back. Looks like he isn’t replying to his staff either! So, at this point I’m thinking maybe this is the sign I’ve been praying for…maybe this is God’s way of saying that this isn’t the place for us. I mean, my gut reaction from my first meeting with him was that our styles did not mesh well. He was multi-tasking during the entire meeting shuffling through papers, sending me an e-mail with the information that we were discussing, etc…and it was obvious he had not taken the time to review any of our information in advance. I ignored the nagging feeling though and just kept thinking “well if we qualify for the low stim who cares if we get along, right?” But now I’m thinking maybe I should have paid closer attention to my intuition…maybe we are meant to stay with Dr. Pearlstone…maybe we are supposed to have this surgery in a few short weeks and then try chlomid and IUI’s a few more times. Maybe this is God’s way of saying that this is the right path for us! So for now I’m going to have faith that it is…and find peace that I haven’t heard from Dr. Ahlering…because it really doesn’t matter anymore…I think we know what is the right next step for us.